Let's Digress

Life and Love

Hello all, the intent of this particular blog is to answer and shed some light on one question that almost everyone has heard at one point or another during their life. And for one woman, her life was drastically changed and the remainder of it revolved around answering this sole question.

Life. One of my favorite foreign phrases to say is c’est la vie. It’s french for “that’s life”. Yes, I say it with a horrible accent and I’m sure I butcher the pronunciation something fierce, but c’est la vie! That’s life. I suck at fake accents. It is quite possibly my greatest downfall. Life isn’t always good, we’ll all have those times when life kicks us in the face just like Anderson Silva kicked Vitor Belfort in the face in UFC 126. It’ll sting a lot, and sure, you’ll be unconscious for a while, but what a story it’ll make!

After. Just like the UFC 126 match, it ends eventually. That particular match ended in under 30 seconds, it set some new records. The rough patch is just that though, it’s a patch. A spot, stint, metaphorical speed bump, road construction, a hill to climb, character to refine, blah blah blah. It will end. A speed bump can’t last forever. It’ll end eventually and we all have to ask ourselves, “how do I want this to affect my life story?”

Love. More music, poetry, and books have been written about this topic than anything else. Human kind seems to be obsessed with finding it. I should know, I’m one of them. The intricacies of the whole “love” concept just astound me. It’s one of the few things that range everywhere from religion to crazed stalkers to pineapple pizza. Love helps the suckiness of life not seem so sucky. Love is like the suspension on your car as you go over the excessively bumpy road construction. You’ll still feel the bumps, and it may seem to last forever if you’re in slow moving traffic, but you feel them a lot less and the drive is more tolerable.

Let me introduce you to Cherilyn… Cheri was in her early 50’s when this all took place, but let’s back up a little. Old school California, a long time ago, Cheri’s dad was a truck driver who had gambling and drinking problems. Her mom was a part time model or something. Her parents remarried and divorced each other several times over, and eventually she started to repeat that same pattern as she got older. Boyfriend after boyfriend, failed relationship after failed relationship. Life was sucky.

Then, she met a guy. This dude was awesome, he liked collecting marbles and singing songs about Babe, it was great. They were so happy, she had finally found love. Why someone would sing about a B-rated pig movie, I don’t know. But they just sang and sang about “getting” that pig. It was beautiful and they were a huge karaoke hit. Seriously, it’s one of the most requested karaoke songs ever.

Eventually, there was a speed bump down the road. Life happened. Cherilyn had one question, and she molded her life around answering it. I’ll never forget when this question was posed to me; I was a delightful 10 year old and my family was on the way up to Elkhart, Indiana for something. I don’t remember why we were going to Elkhart, but I know we were were pulling a camper behind us and 9 year old Trainer Jarrod was annoying me in the back seat. Luckily, Tiny Alec (who really was tiny) was wedged between us sleeping, so I pushed him over on 9-year-old Trainer Jarrod to aggravate. I was quite the adorable instigator back then, now I’m just an instigator when I feel feisty.

Mom and Dad were listening to a CD and it was on repeat for the entire 5 hour drive. It was torture, I swear we listened to that thing 27 times over. Eleanor was sleeping in the front seat between them. She was tiny then too, and it was before she knew how to talk.. ahh, memories. I was fiddling with the locked window switch to kill time. I was bored out of my mind, but I’ll never forget hearing that question. I felt like the music got louder and more repetitive, then everything started shaking.

And then I heard it:

“Do you believe in life after love?”

I didn’t fully know it back then, but that song was the start of something. It was the start of what I would later half-sing during awkward silences.

Before I forget, the music did get louder and more repetitive. Apparently my parents loved that song and kept playing it louder and louder and over and over. I tried to tell them they don’t sing so well, but what parents are going to listen to the musical opinion of a disgruntled 10-year-old? Oh, and everything actually did start shaking. Mainly because I started bouncing in my seat to annoy my brother. I didn’t have many options of things to do. Seriously, we were in that truck for like…9 days. Ok, more like 5 hours. But it felt like 9 days!

My question and answer for Miss Cher still hasn’t changed since that day. It’s still, 1) Life after love? That’s the least of your worries; you have a super deep voice. Is that normal? 2) Why are your insides talking to you like that?

“Do you believe in life after love? I can feel something inside me say, “I really don’t think you’re strong enough.””

See? Is that like…indigestion? Could the answer to her problem simply be to take some Pepto? Is that a metaphor for eating bad Mexican food? My brother said the same kind of thing after he ate a burrito that had been in his car for 72 hours during the summer 2 years ago. He was like “it tasted so good! A little weird, but that gave it character. I feel it moving…I don’t think I’m strong enough to stand right now..”

Yes, that’s gross and I probably should’ve left it out, but it sounds like the same kind of thinking Cher had.

Is there life after love? I don’t know for sure, I guess I would have to know the context and back story of her question better.

Did she ever get an answer? I don’t know. I would like to think so. And I hope she figured out why her insides were talking to her, that’s just kina weird.

All I know is that question is now my primary line to break awkward silences. Sometimes awkward silence is good, but other times it’s fun to make it more awkward with a well-timed poorly phrased question.


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