Let's Digress

ReChurch 2014, Part 2

Day two of ReChurch was great! But let me pick up where I left off with day one…

It was a cold and dreary Indiana day…

Zach and I went to Shan’s workshop; it was about healthy and dysfunctional teams or something.

Good news: His workshop was awesome.

Bad news: I was told it was awesome. So… I may have typed some of (all) the ReChurch Part 1 blog during his workshop…

I can’t really say I’m proud of myself, but I kind of am. Me knocking out an 1100ish-word blog in 75 minutes with those kinds of distractions going on around me is no small feat.

By “distractions”, I mean Shan talking about healthy and dysfunctional teams and Zach constantly berating me about “needing to pay attention” or something because it’s “disrespectful to blatantly ignore the speaker and type a blog during his lecture” and then he said something about how I needed to not act like a child…and then I said something about me being more mature than he was…and then I may have called him a “stinky poo-poo head”, which, in hindsight, may have jeopardized my argument about me being more mature than him.

Anyway, it’s all in the past now. Shan, you did awesome! I was very impressed with your PowerPoint slides; I thought they were quite aesthetically pleasing. I do love a good transition between slides.

But it gets better, I kind of redeem myself here (okay, maybe I don’t). We stayed for Shan’s second workshop too. That one was about conflict mediation, and I did pay attention to it!

I was planning to talk to Shan, after his second workshop was finished, about some problems I was having, but it didn’t happen. These people kept talking to him and complimenting him about how well he did and stuff.

Obviously, those people didn’t notice my overly dramatic personal crisis: I couldn’t find the attractive single women anywhere at this conference. Yes, I saw a few running around, but I couldn’t go talk to them.

That’s what my problem was that I needed to talk to Shan about! I have issues talking to women.

He struck me as someone who was quite the ladies’ man back in his younger days. So I thought I would talk to someone who had already won the game. He had to have done something right to end up marrying his wife, Mrs. Shan (I don’t know her name, so she will be forever known to me as “Mrs. Shan”).

Oh, and his aesthetically pleasing PowerPoint presentations only helped to reinforce my theory. Seriously, any dude who can slap together that awesome of a PowerPoint can’t not be a ladies man; it’s just a fact of life. The presentation even had slide transitions! I repeated the PowerPoint thing on purpose because repeating stuff shows it’s important.

Needless to say, I did not get to speak to him about my predicament that evening. So, I settled for another can of Mountain Dew and some chicken.

And the rest of the night is history… or a blur… I get the two mixed up sometimes.

Stay tuned for day two!

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