Let's Digress

The Damp Blizzard

First off, I would like to say how interesting I find it that my creative brain fluids suddenly start working when I need to do unrequired homework. I was planning on reading ahead for my spring classes or looking over drug doses for pharmacology, but then–out of desperation–I had this “write another blog” idea… and when faced with writing a blog or studying for fun, the blog usually wins. With that in mind, let me recap the past 36ish hours.

Saturday:

Here in good old Indiana, we’re supposed to have blizzard-like conditions tomorrow (Sunday). I’ve been told the high is supposed to be in the negatives (-11 degrees Fahrenheit ish), and the low is supposed to be even more negative. We’re also supposed to have insanely high winds and between 8-14 inches of snow. This will be awesome. And will most likely not happen. The weather people do this every year. They say we’re going to have a terrible snowstorm, and then it turns into a light flurry or a few inches of rain. Did you ever notice that the weatherman is the only profession where you can be 100% wrong and somehow still be right? I think weathermen would excel well in the fake-psychic field. Seriously, the two are very similar. They both make blanket statements and (usually) wrong predictions about the future, and then we all adjust our lives according to what they say.

For those of you who don’t live in Indiana, we haven’t had a blizzard since the 70’s. That’s what I was told anyway, it was a little before my time; I was born in the 90’s. 1990 to be exact. It was a good year for me, full of new beginnings and fresh starts, back when I could whine in public and people would think it was cute. Now they just stare awkwardly and say, “Adam, really? It’s only a cookie. Let your little sister have it.”  Those were the days…

Oh, and for the past 3ish winters we’ve mainly had ice storms. Not so much snow, only ice. Lots and lots of ice. The weather in Indiana is bipolar, just like most of it’s residents. If you don’t like the weather, wait 30 minutes and it’ll be something different. So when the weather people said we’re supposed to get this mass amount of snow, everyone freaked out. Seriously, I went to Walmart 2 days ago to do my weekly grocery shopping and the place was filled with people, but all the food was gone. I almost had to throw a left-from-Thanksgiving turkey at an obese woman to get her to let go of my fruit snacks. I don’t mess around when it comes to fruit snacks, and she obviously didn’t need them. Luckily, I gave her the look (the look, not a look) that said, “do you really need those? The salad stuff is 20 feet to your left, lady.” And the next thing I know, I have acquired a giant box of fruit snacks and the obese woman is waddling over to the salad section.

I went to Kroger on my way to work Saturday morning, I had to buy some things to aid in my mid-shift snacking. It’s 6:30 am on a Saturday, and Kroger is filled with people. Not your typical 50+ seniors either, mind you. It’s mainly 30ish year olds and stuff. They’re all literally fast-walking through the store carrying arm and cart loads of milk, bread, bottled water, cheese, canned food, etc. I thought the Y2K thing was happening again for a second. So all of these people are stocking food for the snowpocalypse, and I’m jut casually strolling through the store carrying a 2-liter of Dr. Pepper, soft taco shells, and paper plates. To be honest, I found it quite amusing. These people are prepping for a winter Armageddon, and I’m carrying around Dr. Pepper and taco shells like it’s just another day.

As I go through the self checkout, the still-in-my-pajamas-because-I’m-only-going-to-Kroger-at-6:30-on-a-Saturday-morning-and-don’t-need-to-get-dressed people stare at me like I’m crazy. So, what do I do? I return the stare. I stare at them like they’re the crazy ones for wearing PJ’s out of the house and for stockpiling food like it’s The Day After Tomorrow movie with Jake Gyllenhaal.

After the checkout stare down is over, I head to work and do awesome work stuff. There’s no snow, no rain, no nothing all day Saturday. Actually, it was almost 40 degrees outside and very bright and sunny. It was kina nice.

Sunday:

I wake up for work at 5 this morning. I figured I should get up a little earlier because of the impending “blizzard”. I walk upstairs, look out the window, and what do I see? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. I see bare roads and no snowfall. There was no “1-3 inches” of snow last night. In fact, when I walk outside it’s still 40ish degrees out. My iPhone said it was 35, but it felt like 40ish to me.

I leave for work, and once I get about half way there, it starts to rain/snow a little. It’s very wet and not sticking to anything at all. It was barely more than a flurry. This Ice Age movie quality blizzard is beginning to be disappointing and anticlimactic.

I’ll edit this post as the damp blizzard progresses. And in hindsight, I think I should’ve brought an umbrella with me instead of my earmuffs.

Just kidding. I don’t actually own earmuffs. That would be strange.

Update – 10 am:

Ok, so…it’s 10am now, and I’m starting to think that we’ll actually see snow. The temperature has dropped a little, and the rainy snow is turning into actual snow, which is starting to accumulate. This would be perfect snowball fighting snow. Dry enough to not soak your gloves entirely, but we enough to still be easily packable.

Update – 2:06 pm:

Well, it’s the afternoon now. We have about 6ish inches of snow, and it’s a wonderful consistency for a snow fort. I made a giant snowball earlier. It’s huge. Seriously, it’s up to my waist. I was going to make a giant snowman, but then I got on a roll with making the base. And I realized 2 things: 1) The ball got too big and I couldn’t roll it anymore. I squatted to heave it up, I heaved…and it didn’t. 2) After the failed rolling, I decided to give up. So I went inside to take a nap and eat a fruit snack. Now there’s much more snow on the ground…and a random snowball sitting by itself. On the up side, it’s about 4 inches taller now. But only on one side.

For more updates, check out the newer blog.

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