At the time of this writing, I have been married for 15 days.
I am already incredibly domesticated, and I’m pretty sure it’s one of the greatest things ever. People say that bachelorhood is the best time in a young man’s life; a time for parties, shindigs, painting the town red with ambition, definitively finding out who one is as a person, being free from all significant ties, and having overall uninhibited and unlabeled noncommittal relational merriment with countless women before being shackled down for life by the weight and baggage of marriage with just one woman.
Well, I’m here to say that those people are completely and utterly wrong.
Like, biggest misconception ever kind of wrong.
Also, keep in mind that I’m a cynically idealistic hopeless romantic at heart and have only been married for two weeks. So I probably, most likely, definitely don’t have this marriage thing figured out to a T yet, nor am I as smart as those old married couples who have been together for 30+ years.
I guess what I’m saying is, take this with a grain of salt if you’re one of those millennials who dislike labels, life-long commitment, and, quite possibly, the greatest and most beautiful experience ever.
Did I mention that this married thing is awesome?
I shall elaborate.
15 days ago today, I married the most brilliant, delightful, morally upright, and sassiest woman I have ever met. The way her thought processes work and the depth of caring and empathy she has for people continually astounds me. Not to mention her cooking is phenomenal and she’s quite fetching.
How I convinced her to literally sign a binding contract stating that she’ll love me and be “for me” forever, no matter what, is still a little beyond my comprehension sometimes. But it’s one of those mysteries I’m more than content to live with.
Really, I like to think that a big part of the successful wooing process is due to this website and my boyish charm.
Anyway, married life is wonderful. Not only am I continually more baffled and elated with the way with this snarky woman carries herself and behaves, but she’s basically legally bound to associate with me. It’s like I have a full-time, 24/7, live-in, always-within-poking-distance best friend or something.
Our ceremony had literally 7 people (including Gabby, the two photographers, and myself) and best friend/officiant Zach wrapped the whole thing up in 11 minutes. He received an extra high five for that.
We did the honeymoon thing at the West Baden resort in southern Indiana. It was incredibly nice. We also rode horses while we were there (I didn’t fall off!) and watched Star Wars Rogue One in theaters. So overall, it was a very good week for me.
Pictures from all of this hubbub should be around here at some point within the next…eventually. Maybe.
My new wife also introduced me to center-cut bacon. It’s like normal bacon, but with half the fat and twice the meat. That was a life changing experience all in itself.
One of the books on my pre-marriage reading list was Sacred Marriage by Gary Thomas. Describing this book as a cocktail of Redbull and a venti hot chai tea latte for one’s spiritual life is a gross understatement. It was incredible to read; most of my copy is heavily written on, highlighted, and dog-eared.
I say that to say this: Someone asked me recently what I’m looking forward to the most during married life. Grinning, I answered, “everything.”
I was contemplating that question again a couple of days ago and I remembered a passage from the Sacred Marriage book. After much thought, I think the last sentences of this paragraph quaintly sums up what I’m looking forward to the most in the days, months, and years to come.
“If you want to be free to serve Jesus, there’s no question—stay single. Marriage takes a lot of time. But if you want to become more like Jesus, I can’t imagine any better thing to do than to get married. Being married forces you to face some character issues you’d never have to face otherwise.”